A whole lot of confusion. I think that is the most fitting way to describe my set of mind lately. I've been reacquainted with emotions I had made my goodbyes to, and I still can't tell what will come out of it. My days are made of high ups and even lower downs, an acute sense of awareness followed closely by this impression of watching the world go round without me, while I'm stranded under a veil of hollowness. I certainly did not miss that.
It's the most strange phenomenon. Feeling myself come alive, awakening, yet not being able to explore it. Being subjected to the change while knowing I have made the choice to keep things as they are. Trying to put words on the whilrwind that is shaking up every aspect of me in order to reduce the state of disarray, like a bullet that's tearing up everything but letting the light shine through in the process.